Saturday, September 5, 2009

harder than I thought

and for a different reason.

As I posted early this week, I knew that this weekend would be a little rough. I just didn't think that I would have problems because of another reason. So far, the memories from a year ago are far from my mind. However, I am sad because my stupidity, my need for someone at the time, is causing me to not be able to celebrate her birthday with her. I thought I could go thru the day without thinking about it, yeah right, but it was worth a shot trying to fool myself. As I sit here replaying the stupid things I have done to everyone, I have tears running down my face. I know that God placed her in my life for a reason, and there is a reason that it was for such a short time - but that doesn't make this hurt any less.

Happy Birthday, where ever you are.

*B thank you for trying to understand these emotions*

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