Monday, October 26, 2009

I HATE THIS

I HATE THIS. I HATE THIS. I HATE THIS. can I scream it one more time??? I HATE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My 5 year old is very, VERY strong willed to say the least. She gets something in her mind and there is no changing it (I wonder where she gets that from)

Here I am, thinking that things are going okay (believe me I know better than to think that they are perfect) because each day when I ask how school was I would be told "great mom I was on green." (Green = good; yellow = cautious behavior; red = trouble) At the beginning of the school year there was a few things that needed ironed out - the teacher sent home a note once and there was one phone conversation. Since then I have heard nothing - until tonight.

Earlier in the evening I had missed a call from the school and they didn't leave a message - warning bell number one. This was at 445 and when I tried to call back 5 minutes later, there was no one to answer the office line (of course). I knew that something wasn't kosher, but I was not going to worry about it. Well then just a little bit ago my phone rang again - school's number. CRAP. It was the elementary principal (warning bell number 2). CRAP CRAP CRAP

It seems that lil Miss Goose has been having issues with authority and the word NO. It also seems that she likes to tell tall tales - that are obviously tall. Therefore, she will be going into a special counseling program at the school. They will be teaching her the skills she needs to survive school (such as respecting authority & following directions). You want to know what is ironic about this - I use to work in a group home teaching delinquent youth these exact same skills.

It breaks my heart to know that my child is struggling. I am placing the blame on me - this child has been through SO MUCH the last six months, and the majority of it was my fault. I let someone in our lives that then decided to just leave - she crys 3 or 4 nights a week because she misses her. Then there are my mental issues - and her being afraid I won't ever come back or be there when she gets home. (the poor child saw me being taken away in the ambulance this summer)

Right before going to bed tonight she told me that she wishes she could go back to preschool because she misses everyone there and how things were.

I HATE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS - Weekly Wisdom - how fitting this one is

We can be joyful at all times not because we are spared affliction but because we are completely satisfied in Christ.

Jesus promises that we will suffer. In Matthew 10:17-18, Jesus warns his followers, "Be on your guard against men; they will hand you over to the local councils and flog you in their synagogues. On my account you will be brought before governors and kings as witnesses to them and to the Gentiles." Although that quote may seem distant or irrelevant to Christians today, the point remains that, in the words of Christ, "if the head of the house [Jesus himself] has been called Beelzebub, how much more the members of his household!"

Not only does Jesus promise that believers must suffer, the Apostle Paul assures us that the path to being an heir of God demands sharing in the sufferings of Christ (Romans 8:17). Similarly, Paul writes this to those in the church at Philippi: it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for him (Philippians 1:29).
Clearly, we, as Christians, will not be spared affliction. (In addition to the Scriptures above, see Acts 9:15-16, Philippians 3:10-11, and 1 Timothy 1:8-9.)

Despite being assured affliction and suffering, Christ-followers can be joyful nonetheless.
We can be joyful not by creating a bubbly-faced facade of happiness to hide reality but rather by confidently knowing that, in the face of immense sin and suffering, we are secure in Christ. Why fear and be saddened by those who can only kill the body when you're protected by Him who can keep you from hell (Luke 12:4-7)? Or, to put it positively, rejoice that you have received the Holy Spirit, who guarantees your eternal salvation—and thus, your eternal joy (2 Corinthians 1:21-22).

The faith that justifies is the very same faith that satisfies. Saving faith satisfies us by weaning us from the short-lived satisfaction of sin to ultimate satisfaction in Christ.

Thus, despite the fact that suffering will come even—or, perhaps, especially—to us who profess faith in Christ, we can have great joy not because we are spared affliction but because we are completely satisfied in Christ.

7 comments:

The World As I See It said...

At least she can get the help she needs now before she gets too much older

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

It could also just be a 5 year old challenging her authorities. My son does that. In fact, when talking to other mother's in his class, most of the kids do it. It's a challenging age.

Holly said...

My son still does this. He started seeing the school counselor in kindergarten and still sees her (he is very emotional). It has been a great thing. I agree with Lee too. I must say I do hate seeing the schools number come up on caller ID.

On a lighter note, there is something for you on my blog.
Holly

Kelly said...

My daughter had this trouble when she started school. She is in 2nd grade now, and she never gets in trouble (at school) and makes straight A's. Don't worry she'll get better. My daughter has had abandonment issues too. Me and her dad split up and he never sees her (his choice). She still has a hard time, but it does get better. Good luck!!

ShellSpann said...

I totally understand. My daughter has had some troubles here and there - luckily not at school. But at home...and it breaks my heart and makes me feel awful :(

*HUGS* I hope she gets the help she needs at school.

Tami G said...

I found you through Holly - great blog - I am a new follower!! =)

what a great post. The verses at the end are very inspirational and how often we forget there really is a method to the madness we call life!
I have a 14 year boy - teenagers make me wanna pull my hair out!! ha ha

Hope everything works out with school for her :)

Tami G

kys said...

I hope things get better for her at school. Don't beat yourself up about it too much.